GREED VS. GIVING BACK

Everybody can be great…because anybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.   

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Healthy selfishness is a virtue. One should always act in one’s best interest. At first glance you might think I advocate greed. I don’t. I think being addicted to greed and accumulating way more than you need isn’t a healthy way of living. I’ve known people who were very wealthy but also very depressed because they were locked into a lifestyle that focused rather narrowly on wealth versus having a broader vision that allowed a more balanced multi-dimensional life. One of the saddest  stories I remember hearing was a woman proudly telling me that she had 3 washer/dryers. She had nothing more interesting to relate than some marker of her wealth.

Giving back and contributing to society is part of the good life. This isn’t a moral stance or obligation; it’s an example of acting in your best interest. We all desire a sense of community and crave real connection with others. Don’t we all treasure those rare moments of real connection?  Giving back can provide the backdrop for intimacy and closeness.

There are many ways of giving back. Finding a way that accommodates your desires, circumstances and  temperament is really the key.

I’ve been involved for 4 years in a program to help multiple offenders who are leaving prison to learn the skills required to make a successful go of it in society. It’s been immensely rewarding on so many levels. Real relationships are established and lessons are learned. It’s reinforces my belief  that we all have vast amounts of unrealized potential.  Although one can  assist and be a catalyst, real success comes when the mentee is willing to do the heavy lifting and assume responsibility for his life.

It’s so inspiring to read heroic tales about people giving back. I recently read a wonderful biography about Raoul Wallenberg –  One of the great heroes of World War ll.  In 1944 as a Swedish diplomat in Budapest, he saved tens of thousands of Hungarian Jews from certain death.  Sadly he was taken into custody by the Russians at the beginning of 1945 and simply disappeared.

Kathy travels a lots and always generously over tips the maids. I suspect that no one grows up thinking “Someday I want to be a maid and clean up after strangers”. You know the money is appreciated and needed. It’s also comforting to know that nothing is deducted for administrative costs or overhead.  Kathy has started a mini-movement among travelling businessmen. She is quite the salesman.

Whenever we eat out and the waiter (or waitress) is a youngster working his way through school, we like to help out. Thornton Wilder explained our thinking beautifully  “Money is like manure; it’s not worth a thing unless it’s spread around encouraging young things to grow.”

If we are not there for each other what’s the point of existence.